HATE LOST, LOVE WON

2 comments

My ex-husband resented me. He admitted it during our relationship. However, I didn’t realize the extent of this resentment until after he chose to leave. What transpired during our relationship, caused me a great deal of stress. I will not divulge those details in this post. However, I have found solace in knowing that God was present and He knows. After I confronted my husband about a situation, he left. I went to my oncologist after our conversation, came home and he was all packed up and headed out of the door telling me that these weren’t his intentions. Of course, he didn’t expect me to arrive back so soon. AWKWARD!!!

It is true that in ALL things, we must give thanks.

Months later, I discovered that in order to gain sympathy and support, my narcissistic ex-husband attempted to destroy my character. He could not have people know that he abandoned his wife, whom he swore to lay down his life for. So, instead, I was the evil person who kicked him and his children out unexpectedly. It was me, who spent up the fortune he had in his head within three years and left him penniless with nothing. I was sleeping with his best friend and his colleagues. Needless to say, he was remarried within 3 months of leaving (the divorce was speedy). It was all my fault. I accepted it as people who I’ve known for as long as I knew my ex (32 years) spread these rumors. I chose to not defend my name at that time. Why should I have to? In fact, I knew my ex since I was 7 years old and I believed that he was everything HE SAID he was…integral, intentional, honest. I knew everyone else believed the same about him. I definitely wasn’t going to waste a single breath justifying my expectations to people whom are infatuated with titles and hermeneutics. I knew they could care less about me and my feelings. So, I took it. I embraced it all. I found humor in some stuff and sadness in others.

It’s not about who starts with you, it’s mainly about who helps you to finish.

Most importantly, I learned a valuable lesson. God is a protector. Even though it seemed bad, it all worked for my good. Always check your heart. Don’t allow the way others see or feel about you become your reality. Accept when you are too much for someone. Either they will adjust or move on. Be ok with either choice. God sent people in my life who encouraged me daily. Not the usual suspects. Even though, my closest friends showed up. I couldn’t tell them everything. They would simply take everything personally and I needed a bit more objectivity. These people truly invested in my life and well-being. They invested more than my ex ever did. Which is why it was easy for him to leave. See, true investors are always looking for a return. It’s easy to discard of something you haven’t invested in. Notice the investments that people make in your life. Are they good or bad? What type of investments are you making in the lives of others?

2 comments on “HATE LOST, LOVE WON”

  1. I’m not going to say much but what I will say is I’ve had that same experience with the same person but not on a intimate level on a spiritual one and to be honest my heart for some reason always had some form of sympathy for you! I pray for because I know/knew what you were up against. I still pray for you!! The experience I had caused much hurt, resentment, anger, fear, questions for God, slander of my name/character etc. but God is a healer and protecter!!! Keep loving and keep fighting God has you!! ❤️

    Liked by 1 person

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